Walt Longmire & I

 

 

 

 

Walt Longmire kills his wife’s killer.

The next episode opens with Paul Otten’s melodic tones, and a collage of what the Sheriff of Absaroka County did during his mandatory leave. He’s taking a shower, trying to wash the widower-hood off. He’s washing blood off his hands. He’s demolishing the blood stained steps he had finally gotten rebuilt (the early episodes of “Longmire” depicts Walt’s cabin as dilapidated. Husbands stop caring about such things when their Wives die). He’s growing a beard. He’s outside building a bookshelf to replace the one he destroyed in a widower’s rage. He’s drinking Rainier and reading books on the porch.

 

He’s in the sunshine.

 

It’s the first day back on the job and he shaves his beard, but he has stubble by the time he gets to his front porch with his rifle and green Stanley thermos of French pressed coffee.

 

Because he’s Walt Longmire.

 

You have hope for Walter Longmire.

 

As if peace had finally swam up the stream into his waiting hands.

 

But peace is one elusive fish.

 

As he surveys the world from his front porch a pained expression creeps over his rugged features.

 

He goes back inside because it’s finally time to replace his dead wife’s voice on the answering machine.

 

After the beep all he can choke out is “This is Walt”.

 

The pain of the world, and all the years without her suddenly take their familiar roost on his hunched shoulders.

 

There’s some pain you just can’t kill.

 

There are some killers you can’t exact revenge from.

 

And “Longmire” shows us it wouldn’t help even if you could.

 

Even if I could kill The Cancer it wouldn’t bring back my Resplendent Bride.

 

There must be something more redemptive than vengeance.

 

The tear swept soul needs more than hate can provide in order to mend.

 

I started watching “Longmire” because my wife made me. I was surprised that I liked it because I initially thought she was watching some sort of ABC Family western romantic comedy. You know the type. My Resplendent Bride watched a lot of television while she fought The Cancer. It was one of the few things she could do. I dutifully watched all sorts of fascinating shows with her. One was some kind of teen melodrama about Australian ballerinas.

 

That’s okay. One quickly learns that being a Husband isn’t really about you.

 

Now, back to “Longmire”, well, “Longmire” is about a widower trying to put his life back together after the death of his wife. Initially everyone thinks Walt’s wife died of cancer.

 

It seemed like an odd thing for Danielle to choose to watch.

 

One night she was feeling pretty good, so we went on a date. She wanted to go to some movie named “Safe Haven”, which turned out to be about a dead wife playing matchmaker for her widower husband… from beyond the grave.

 

How morbid! How odd. Funny. We laughed about it.

 

But maybe Danielle knew what she was doing. She always knew more than me.

 

After Danielle died I kept watching Longmire because she couldn’t.

 

It sort of helps…

 

It helps to watch a character struggle with all the same pain you’re wrestling with.

 

I hold onto hope for Walt Longmire.

 

I hold onto hope for me too.

 

I think the Lord will put it all right.

 

 

“For He must reign until He has put all His enemies under His feet. The last enemy to be destroyed is death.”

 

 

 

(1 Corinthians 15:25-26 ESV)

3 Comments

  1. Amelia

    I hold onto hope for you, too. Every day. Every night. Jesus loves you, Evan. What a blessing is Danielle.

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